Where has my mind gone?

Staying passionate seems so exhausting lately...people around me keep excusing my behavior because it is winter, however I know this is bull shit. I am being lazy and unmotivated by my passions. It's like the people at the airport who step on to the level escalator instead of continuing to walk. I used to be one of the people walking along side it and lately I feel like I am just being dragged down the hall, mindless and standing still. Even this blog is a remembrance, I have started so many posts and abandoned them. Telling myself they aren't good enough. I don't know why I even care, no one follows this blog. Its existence was supposed to be for my own intellectual well being. Am I drowning myself in bad faith here and in my professional life which I can't seem to separate as different aspects of what I call my life.